It’s no coincidence I’m following yesterday’s goal of “living” with today’s goal regarding death. Like a lot of content creators, I plan and schedule my posts in advance, so I’ve known the entire list of goals for a month now, and arranged them in an order that I liked… and when I got to these two goals, I thought it would be fitting to put them back to back with each other.
What I didn’t plan for was that a horrific real life example would make this goal even more of a priority for me.
Judge me and condemn me if you feel you must, but I don’t have a will. And with that I don’t have any guardians named for my kids, or even an executor. Horrible, right?!? I know! And that’s why this is on my list of goals this year! It needs to get done.
There have been three reasons I haven’t made it a priority. All of them horrible and none of them valid.
I have very little that would amount to an “estate”.
What are the odds of BOTH Lisa and I dying/being killed at the exact same time?
I’m struggling with who to name as guardian(s).
On January 1st my cousin and his wife along with two of their five kids were killed in a tragic accident. I don’t know about you, but when I hear about situations like this, my mind tries to imagine what it must be like for the survivors - in this case three kids. My next thought was: what’s going to happen to those kids? Where are they going to go? Who is going to finish raising them? That’s where the will and declaration of guardianship comes in - and it hit home for me in that moment that I’m not prepared.
Yet, I’m still struggling SO MUCH even as I write this blog, as I am frozen in place with not knowing how to proceed. Oh, I know how to make a will. I just don’t have anyone to name within that will. If this doesn’t convey the island of isolation I live on, nothing else ever will.
What will happen to my kids if I don’t name anyone and no one claims them if we die? Obviously in THAT moment it won’t matter to me anymore… because I’ll be gone. But first of all, that is the MOST selfish and incredibly unfair thing to put on my kids. And secondly, how do I go about living with myself knowing that this may be the outcome if a tragic situation were to occur. I can’t.
This is the LEAST fun goal on my list, but one of, if not THE most important one. One way or another, I have to make some tough decisions and possibly make some phone calls; because preparing a will and assigning guardianship is the 18th goal of my #2021Twenty and I am going to DEMAND that it be completed. I will not flip the calendar into 2022 without this goal fulfilled. Please hold me to that!