Emasculating


Is there anything emasculating about being a Dad?


This week an ignorant buffoon (and father of four) lashed out on Twitter to his 6 million followers, ridiculing and shaming a celebrity dad for baby wearing. He moved on and attacked another celebrity dad for dressing up in costumes, stating it was emasculating and likely only done because their wife or girlfriend told them to. It’s sad that blood runs this cold in some people, and that extreme sexism is implied here – BY ONE OF OUR OWN! The Dads of the Internet immediately rallied posting pictures of themselves wearing their children in carriers and pictures of them in costumes having tea parties with their little girls. 15K comments later, and it became a trending topic on Twitter, with countless tweets being sent out – and he just continued to shame and belittle as many of them as possible.


A dad using his celebrity soap box to bully other dads for being a dad.


We’ve got big problems here.


I’ve written about corporations who leave Dads out in their marketing, implying that Dads don’t interact with their kids. I’ve written about random people – generally older people who feel they need to bless the world with their ignorant, sexist comments. But I’ve never even thought that I would be sabotaged by a fellow Dad… sorry scratch that…all he is, is a father. Any man can be a father – that’s the masculine part of the situation, but it takes someone special and committed to be a Dad. This dumbass is a father of four, but a Dad to none, and due to his insecurities and shortcomings, he’s now lashing out at those of us who have figured it out and embrace it on a daily basis.


I feel like we’re the under dogs already, especially those of us who are stay-at-home Dads. This is a huge blow to our team. If you’re into sports analogies, it’s like we just scored on our own goal. It’s not right.


Emasculate means to “make a man feel less male by taking away his power and confidence or to deprive a man of his male role or identity”.

I don’t understand how being a Dad to my children, whether that be wearing them in a carrier or having a tea party with them can be called or seen as emasculating. A real man will tell you that he has never felt MORE like a man or identifies with his role MORE than when becoming a Dad.


I proudly wear my children in carriers, I engage in imaginary play with my kids – even if it involves props and costumes, I cook for my kids, I wash their clothes, I clean the bathroom, I go grocery shopping, I strap my kids into their car seats, and I drop my oldest off at preschool amidst a sea of moms. None of these activities or tasks takes away my power or confidence. None of them deprive me of my role or identify. In fact, it enforces it. Because to my three kids:


I
AM
DAD!

Ironically the only emasculating thing in this situation was this daft twat’s tweet. God, I hate Twitter!

© 2019 by Dale Allen Berg